Proceed, Whack Jobs

Via TPM, I was sent to this website, [fair warning:  crazy people on the other end of that link] to find this image:


There has been plenty of ridicule directed at the project depicted here — see, for example, posts by others at my alternate blog-home, Balloon Juice.  If you haven’t been keepign up, it’s called the Citadel — that Wingnut fantasy of a Dungeons-and-Dragons-and-Bushmasters retreat in Idaho where no liberals need apply.

All fine — if it were up to me, I’d encourage every gun nut to retreat to their bastions — whether up in the Idaho panhandle, where generations of actually competent folks have found it so easy to construct self-sustaining livelihoods …or in GlennBeckistan, that to-be self-sustaining (sic!) entertainment and intellectual hub to be constructed somewhere in Texas.

Go! Here’s your hat; what’s your hurry?

Seriously:  if they would only do the rest of us the favor of retreating to their own private Somali-o’s, our politics and our societies would be that much saner and safer.

But we knew that already, and that’s not what caught my eye.


Here’s the story:  As I’d just opened the picture above, my son happened to come into my study.  He asked what I was looking at — it seemed to him a sketch from one of the medieval combat games he likes and knows I don’t, and he wondered what would possess me to bother with such a thing.

I told him that, no, this wasn’t history or fantasy,* but rather somebody’s actual idea of someplace that would serve to protect them from an overweening federal government.  He just looked at it pityingly, wondering, and he asked me, “have these folks never heard of cannon?”

And damn if that hadn’t been literally my first thought on reading the caption “Interior Defensive Walls & Towers.”  I mean, artillery much?

The stupid.  It burns. With the white-hot-heat-of-a-thousand-suns.

*Well, it is.  But not that kind.

Explore posts in the same categories: bad ideas, Guns, ridicule


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6 Comments on “Proceed, Whack Jobs”

  1. Blaise Pascal Says:

    Cannon, artillery, helicopters, drones…

    Heck, I bet even Edward Longshanks could wreak havok on such a “citadel”.

  2. Tom Says:

    Hell, if he could make the Welsh submit and the Scots jump, a bunch of weekend warriors playing soldier in the north woods would hardly present much of a challenge, I’d say.

  3. Stuart in Austin Says:

    Contemplate what a nuke at 3000 feet over that would do.

  4. kromaggx Says:

    To me it looks more like it’s loosely based on a prison design. Take from that what you will.

  5. Kaleberg Says:

    I love the interior walls. It’s like what the US Army did with Baghdad, setting up internal barriers to fight internal terrorists, that is, guys with truck bombs. I’m not sure of the cartographic conventions in use, but does each house have its own set of walls? Good fences, good neighbors, I suppose.

    You’ll also notice the town center is apparently zoned commercial, in contrast the the neighborhoods which are zoned residential. These are obviously not anti-zoning sorts, which is odd given so many of this ilk are anti-zoning.

    Also, the only industry seems to be the arms factory, hard by the city walls. That might not be the best defensive place for it, and I’m not going to get into the access route issues for the necessary materials. It’s obviously meant to be more than a gunsmith’s shop, but lacks the expected industrial infrastructure.

    There are also a number of glaring omissions. Where is the power plant? Where is the reservoir? Where are the waste settling tanks? There may be room for residential septic systems, but that town center will need a few “ladies” and “gents”. Surely they aren’t relying on the local power grid and town water and sewage.

    Where is the fuel store? Where’s the shooting range? Where is the ammo dump? (Military ammo dumps consist of small bunkers widely separated in large fields, so are distinctive from the air.)

  6. sohbet Says:

    asd, how original! Your work makes it increasingly difficult for me to ingest the gruel served up by New York Times columnists (they favour speculation leading to cliche). Sorry for the gushing but I am genuinely appreciative.

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